...that have nothing to do with the actual act of pushing out your baby.
1. Most doulas, me included, base our work on EVIDENCE BASED INFORMATION. The idea of a "big baby" is not evidence based. The idea of your weight being a factor to not vaginally deliver your baby is not evidence based. The idea to have an induction because you are passed your due date is not evidence based. (Note, babies aren't fruit or milk, they don't expire. Therefore they don't have a due date.) One of our jobs as doulas to help inform you of your choices and the evidence and science behind what is or is not presented to you so that you can make an informed, confident decision about your birth.
This is an excellent website to find evidence based information evidencebasedbirth.com/
2. Whether you are a few days, hours, weeks, months postpartum, doulas are still your doula. We can help with all sorts of things besides birth. Baby won't sleep, baby is on a nursing strike, baby won't stop crying, baby won't sleep. OR you can't sleep, you're not eating, you can't stop crying. We are your resource for all things pregnancy, birth, baby related. And we really do want you to succeed as a parent in the way that works best for you. We are a tight community, especially in the Twin Cities, and we have resources and experts that we know personally and professionally to pass you onto.
3. In relation to the one above, doulas are someone to talk to that is not your mother/sister-in-law,/best friend,/nosey neighbor/old lady at the grocery store who gives you unsolicited advice. I mean, how often can you hear "You know, that child is going or not going to ...." and then they tell you something that you never asked for. I am not saying that all those people are bad people but some have a vested interest in the topic at hand and unknowingly may not say the right thing or give helpful information. You can show your sore, bloody nipple to your doula without being concerned that it may come back into a conversation without warning. Your doula is a neutral party with your needs and best interests at heart.
4. We are not your family. That being said, you are in the midst of creating or extending your family and all important parties should be involved as far as you would like them to be. The difference of having a doula versus a family member, we don't take our past stories or other births into your birth story. This is YOUR journey, YOUR story and we are just there to witness and support you as it unfolds. However, if you do have a wonderful relationship, we always welcome family members as long as you welcome them too.
5. This is so much more than giving birth. It is an intimate, vulnerable experience, not your high school graduation or 21st birthday party. It's a moment of tremendous change and you have a doula to observe your power, your love, your connection to your partner and your baby. Doulas are there for for you; to hold onto, to whisper your fears to, to take your frustration, to hold your space, to physically hold you up and to catch you when you stumble, literally and figuratively. And to watch your love heart grow 1000 times in an instant.
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Sarah: Birth doula, wife, mother, coffee and wine drinker, lover of beer, books and tattoos.